Column: Handy check list for when your spouse is obsessed 

It happens to all of us. We, at times, get obsessed with getting a project done and we can’t rest until it happens. For someone very close to me, recently that project has been keeping the small creek in our neighborhood clear of trees, limbs and other debris.

This creek looks pretty harmless most of the year, but you should have seen it that time we got about 2-3 inches of rain in a short period of time. I was concerned about the homes in our neighborhood and that was before we saw items floating around in the flood water. The bridge on our main rural road through the neighborhood was underwater along with a good stretch of the road.

It was so bad that the township even came out and officially blocked it off with some sawhorse barriers, high water warnings and closed signs. Then, after the water went down, the road was a muddy mess.

Yes, we are in the middle of a drought but let’s always keep in mind the safety saying, “Turn around, don’t drown.” I’ve seen many news stories over the years where an unfortunate person lost their life because they tried to drive through high water. And a lot of the time, it’s hard to judge the depth of the water until it’s too late and your vehicle gets flooded and dies. In the case of high water, it is always better to be safe.

So, I can understand the need to keep up with all that Mother Nature throws into our little creek or washes down from upstream. 

The first cleanup plan involved using me as chief go-fer and backup help if anything went wrong. This was not a good plan because I had my own stuff to do that had to get done that day.

I decided to come up with a handy checklist that you can consult when obsession takes over, and stuff needs done. Is it an emergency by these guidelines?

-What is your spouse doing? Are they on deadline? Have they told you for the past 28 years that they do not have time to help you on deadline day?

-Is this project going to put your spouse in proximity to poison ivy? Will it leave them without a nice shady spot to sit for the duration? Will they have to check themselves for ticks when they’re done?

-Will you ask your spouse to drive not one but two vehicles/mower that they have never driven before? And that they refuse to drive just because you are standing in a creek with muck boots on?

-Could you do the job yourself with your excellent collection of tools and equipment?

Plan B of big branch creek cleanup actually did not require any help from me. Yet, I was still concerned and came up with another checklist question to include.

-Even though you say you do not need help with your new cleanup plan, will it cause your wife to have enough angst that she will have to sit outside on the picnic table while you are working. With her computer because she is on deadline. And to stop and listen after each roar of the chain saw and sound of tree limbs cracking to make sure there is no screaming afterward? Of course, she will have her cell phone handy to call 911 if she does hear screaming.

Of course, I think we all know what we should do if the answer to any of these checklist questions is yes. That would be Plan C.