Making plans

I’d like to tell you about the cruise we’re booking.

I’d like to tell you about our plans to finally visit Paris. I’d like to tell you about the train trip through the Rockies we’re looking forward to. I’d like to tell you about the Rod Stewart concert we finally scraped up enough money to afford. I’d like to tell you we have plans to visit the Pacific coast. Heck, I’d like to tell you we’re going out for dinner on Saturday night. But no …

We’ve been persuaded to “get our affairs in order.” Not my idea of a good time, but our daughter, Miss Organization, has been poking us in that direction for a while now and we’ve finally given in and agreed it’s probably a good idea to let her in on our “situation,” financially speaking. I assured her we have our wills and she’s in line to get everything we’re not taking with us. Her name is on all our financial business, meager as it is.

Ours is a simple matter. She’s in charge when the day comes that, well, you know … She can dole out whatever’s left of the physical stuff to whomever she pleases. Goodwill, yard sale, whatever. We have very few requests and even then, it’s up to her what happens at the end. Not to be morbid, but we all know there’s no way around it – when your number’s up, it’s hasta la vista, baby!

I once mentioned, rather casually, that I thought a Viking funeral might be a pretty good send-off. My son-in-law jumped on that one right away! He may even be amassing his arsenal of arrows as we speak. With my love for Chippewa Lake and my rebellious spirit, I can visualize it now. There is bound to be some drinking involved. I’m pretty sure the Vikings were a pretty rowdy bunch.

I’m sad to say most of my rowdy friends have already shuffled off, but their spirit lives on and hopefully a glass or two will be raised as the arrows find their way over the waters. What a fine send-off! (I noticed replica Viking ships can be found at a very reasonable price on the Temu website, though it may involve more accuracy with the flaming arrow.)

Other than that, we are doing our best to spend what we can while we’re here, while at the same time staying in our house as long as possible. To that end, the “kids” are doing all in their power to keep us in our own home – and out of theirs, I’m sure – for as long as possible. Before long, I’ll have my laundry located in a vacant bedroom closet on the living level of the house we’ve been in for more than 50 years.

They’ve installed a new, very large-screen TV in the living room so we don’t have to go downstairs to watch “Jeopardy!” anymore. But, and it’s a big but, I have nowhere to go when his cowboys ride in for the rest of the evening. Pssst, don’t tell anyone, but I have been very carefully venturing downstairs if I want to watch something – anything – else, until my new getaway room is complete with my own TV.

And so, to complete the package, we met with a funeral director. Yeah. Those “final arrangements”! Other than the Viking idea, we had to write a check to make sure most of what we have in mind to do will be done. After all was signed, sealed and delivered, the very pleasant fellow in charge shook my hand and said, ironically, “There, you’re good to go!” Perfect.