Panel urges education and accountability to combat domestic violence and abuse

Violent physical acts among families or communities are everywhere.

The only way they can be derailed is by people acting one report and one step at a time.

The Community Gathering on Harm, Safety and the Law took place in Winesburg Monday, Oct. 20, where a large contingent gathered to learn more about the law from a host of specialists.

The evening of panel discussion began with Jomel Spurlock, Homeland Security Investigations, victim assistance specialist, emceeing the Q-and-A panel featuring numerous law officials and advocates who work with domestic violence and sexual abuse cases.

The panel of professionals included Matt Muzik and Mike Bickis, Holmes County prosecutor and assistant prosecutor, respectively; Jennifer Thomas, intake supervisor with Wayne County Children’s Services; Mandy Willets, executive director with Noah’s Hope CAC; deputy Kirk Shelly of the Wayne County Sheriff’s Office; Gayle Byrne, advocate for OneEighty; and JP Rigaud, special agent with the Bureau of Criminal Investigation.

Together, the panel used its expertise to answer a host of questions put forth by the community members who attended the event.

The questions ranged in topics including statute of limitations in sexual abuse crimes, overcoming victim blaming in domestic abuse cases, intimidation laws within the church, children’s services and the fear of taking children out of the home, sexual abuse in marriage, the idea of not holding perpetrators accountable out of either fear or love and more.

Bickis said all these domestic and sexual abuse cases don’t pertain to any one demographic in society but show up everywhere, regardless of race, religion or financial structure.

“These are not unique to any community,” Bickis said.

He stressed the importance of reporting all possible cases because not reporting and protecting the perpetrator of violence only encourages them to continue their ways to that same individual or others.

Rigaud said there are many barriers for those encouraged to come forward and speak about domestic violence or sexual abuse in the home or communities in which they live.

He said the first step in deterring these situations is becoming more educated about the law and what needs to take place to stop these acts of violence.

“Your being here tonight and educating yourselves is one of the ways to push that barrier out of the way,” Rigaud said. “The further you find the freedom to make the decision when it comes to these secrets, these hidden things, the greater the momentum within your own community. We must continue to encourage and support those individuals and to stand by them.

“I know it sounds simple, but those are real challenges individuals and communities are facing. It’s moving beyond that one day or that one incident that begins the road to recovery.”

Discussing the fear of having children taken from the home, Thomas said that is a misconception because the entire hope and direction of children’s services is to keep the family together in the home if it is safe.

“Our job is to investigate, arrange interviews with those involved, and if we can keep the child safe in that home, that is what we desire,” Thomas said, noting that oftentimes recommendations for counseling can help keep the families together.

She said the other aspect of their role is remaining involved with the family long-term to ensure the safety of all involved.

Every single person on the panel agreed the first step in overcoming domestic violence or sexual abuse cases is having the courage to step up and get the proper organizations involved, noting it takes courage not only from those experiencing it, but also for the community members who see it happening.

Spurlock said while domestic violence and sexual abuse cases are terrifying and can be embarrassing, those experiencing them shouldn’t let those actions determine their worth in society.

“The hardest thing that you might experience in your life doesn’t define who you are,” Spurlock said. “It doesn’t define what doors you can walk through. There is always hope and options available to you.”

She said people experiencing domestic violence and other offenses shouldn’t hesitate or be insecure about reaching out to professionals for help because those people can be instrumental in helping overcome obstacles and get people to work through what can be difficult circumstances.

Spurlock said she grew up in a home filled with domestic violence, and until she was exposed to what was healthy and safe, she never knew a different lifestyle.

“With all of you here being educated today, it gives you an opportunity to educate those in your circle of influence, the people you connect with on a daily basis,” Spurlock said, adding people need to keep one another accountable and not rely on the next person to make a difference or make contact regarding domestic violence. “We are responsible to stand in the gap for those who can’t take care of themselves. I encourage and empower all of you to take what you’ve learned tonight and not just keep it (in your heart), but use it to impact those around you, to help someone else or to change yourself.”

If someone is experiencing sexual abuse or domestic violence in the home or community, they are encouraged to reach out to organizations designed to help them through those trying circumstances.