Housebroken

Battling the blemishes that plague our homes

From peeling paint to stubborn mildew, one homeowner shares the humorous — but relatable — challenges of keeping a house looking its best.

It is an unfortunate fact that houses are prone to complexion problems. It’s a source of great embarrassment to houses to suddenly break out with blistering, peeling paint. Even brick, stucco and stone houses are not immune because their trim is usually painted. The most effective treatment for this unsightly condition is a good scraping, followed by general applications of fresh paint.

Paint blister and peel syndrome is a chronic condition for which there is no permanent cure. The best you can hope for is regular treatments will keep your house symptom-free.

To save their homes from embarrassment, some homeowners elect to have their houses stained while others clad their homes in aluminum or vinyl siding. While this solves one surface problem, it is no defense against that most dreaded of all blemishes — mildew.

A moldy monster, mildew is made up of thousands of tiny fungi that like to get together on damp surfaces and reproduce like mad. It is a blight that mortifies houses and frustrates homeowners. Interior outbreaks of mildew are bad enough, but at least the disfigurement is behind closed doors. Exterior eruptions are right out there for the whole neighborhood to see.

A stunning house owned by friends suffered agonies of embarrassment last summer over her mildew-sullied complexion.

A large, white house, she broke out in gray blotches and looked awful. Our friends had two choices: pay to have the house repainted in a mildew-matching gray or pay to have the house scrubbed and rinsed each month.

Refusing to be defeated by fungi, our friend’s husband chose to buy an expensive piece of equipment to blow the mildew to kingdom come. It worked great after he got the hang of it. A few shattered shutters and a broken window pane or two are a small price to pay for a house with a clear complexion. That house is so happy now and looks great.

Laura Moore can be emailed at lehmoore1@gmail.com.

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